The Lotus, The Lakes,
and the Laundry.
A manifesto for the “Middle Ground” of parenting. Tracking the chaos of a blended family, reclaiming culture in Coon Rapids, and finding the humor in sleep deprivation.
Hi. We’re Jacob and Ashwini. We live in the Land of 10,000 Lakes, and we currently have about 10,000 unanswered questions about parenting.
Welcome to Our Digital Basecamp
Lotus of the Lakes is where we document the messy, funny, and often confusing reality of raising a blended family in Minnesota. We aren’t “Instagram Perfect” parents. We don’t have a beige living room (well, not for long, anyway). We are “Is that chocolate or poop on my sleeve?” parents.
We believe in “Edutainment”—because if you aren’t learning and laughing, you’re just crying over spilled milk. And let’s be honest, we do plenty of that too. This site is our test trial. We are tracking our children’s growth, our own sanity, and the products that actually help us survive the day-to-day.
Jacob Zwack
The Executive Jokester
I’m the Chief Fun Officer and the guy trying to turn “Dad Jokes” into a respectable currency. My parenting style is 50% strategy, 50% “winging it,” and 100% coffee-fueled.
By Day: Licensed MN Realtor
I help families find homes big enough to contain their chaos. I’m a licensed agent with The Minnesota Real Estate Team (RENE, C2EX, SRS, ABR). Search MN Listings at mnbyjz.com →
By Night: Web Builder
I build the internet for small businesses at buildmybizweb.com and test my stand-up material at theexecutivejokester.com.
Ashwini
Curator of Curry & Chaos
Ashwini is the heart (and brains) of this operation. As an Indian adoptee raised in the Midwest, she brings a perspective you won’t find on every other blog.
The Mirror Effect
“When I look at Zara, I wonder if the joy I feel is what my birth parents felt. It makes me grateful for every moment I get to witness.”
Current Mission:
Reclaiming roots in real-time. Introducing Zara to Indian music, movies, and yes—finding an Indian version of Rapunzel.
Superpower: Product Research Kryptonite: Spicy FoodThe Board of Directors
Athena (9)
The Assistant Manager
Currently in that sweet spot between playing with dolls and asking for a smartphone. The creative soul of the house.
Zara (2)
The CEO
She runs the schedule, decides when we sleep, and audits the diaper budget daily. Loves her “Brown Dolly” more than us.
Unfiltered: The “Mom” Interview
We sat down with Ashwini to get the real story.
Q: What is the one piece of parenting advice you absolutely hate?
“‘Enjoy every moment.’ Even though I know it comes from the heart, it’s just so generic. I enjoy the moments naturally, so it’s frustrating when people constantly remind me to do it, as if I’m failing if I’m not smiling while cleaning up a blowout.”
Q: If the house was on fire (God forbid), what’s the one item you grab for Zara?
“Her Brown Dolly we got at the dollar store. It cost one dollar, but she kisses it goodnight every single night. It’s irreplaceable.”
Q: Describe Jacob as a household appliance.
“A Coffee Grinder. I couldn’t think of a logical reason why… I just said it for fun. But maybe because he’s loud in the morning and essential for energy?”
Why “Lotus of the Lakes”?
The Lotus represents Ashwini’s roots—blooming beautifully even in muddy water. The Lakes are our home. Together, they represent our mission: to blend our worlds, track our growth, and offer you the solutions that actually saved our butts.
Full Transparency: We use affiliate links on this site to pay for diapers. If you buy something through our suggestions, we earn a commission at no extra cost to you. Thanks for funding the chaos.
Privacy Policy
Last Updated: January 19, 2026
At Lotus of the Lakes, accessible from lotusofthelakes.com, one of our main priorities is the privacy of our visitors. This Privacy Policy document contains types of information that is collected and recorded by Lotus of the Lakes and how we use it.
1. Information We Collect
We collect information to provide better services to all our users.
- Personal Information: When you subscribe to our newsletter or leave a comment, we may ask for your name and email address.
- Log Files: Like many other websites, Lotus of the Lakes makes use of log files. The information inside the log files includes internet protocol (IP) addresses, browser type, Internet Service Provider (ISP), date/time stamp, referring/exit pages, and possibly the number of clicks.
2. Cookies and Web Beacons
Lotus of the Lakes uses ‘cookies’. These cookies are used to store information including visitors’ preferences, and the pages on the website that the visitor accessed or visited. The information is used to optimize the users’ experience by customizing our web page content based on visitors’ browser type and/or other information.
3. Affiliate Disclosure
Lotus of the Lakes is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and other affiliate programs. These are affiliate advertising programs designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com and other partner sites.
What this means for you: If you click a link on our site and make a purchase, we may receive a small commission. This does not increase the price you pay, but it helps us keep the lights on.
4. Children’s Information (COPPA)
We are parents, so protecting children is our priority. Lotus of the Lakes does not knowingly collect any Personal Identifiable Information from children under the age of 13. We share stories about our children, but we encourage parents to observe, participate in, and/or monitor and guide their online activity.
5. Third Party Privacy Policies
Lotus of the Lakes’s Privacy Policy does not apply to other advertisers or websites. Thus, we are advising you to consult the respective Privacy Policies of these third-party ad servers for more detailed information.
6. Consent
By using our website, you hereby consent to our Privacy Policy and agree to its Terms and Conditions.
If you have additional questions or require more information about our Privacy Policy, do not hesitate to contact us at jakezwack@gmail.com.